Theatre Producer Pillows

"If we hadn't met, would you still be producing fringe theatre?"

'He really wanted to get into the zombie role, so he became a Meth-Head actor.'

"For the best picture not having won anything thereby being eliminated from this category..."

"Just be yourself."

Showbiz Awards

Screenwriters pitch movie to studio boss: 'It's a reinterpretation of Bicycle Thieves, that classic of Italian neo-realism. We're calling it, Dude, Where's My Chopper?'

"I kid you not, blood was oozing from the walls! Unfortunately, it was fake: I had stumbled on the set of a horror movie..."

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

Producer, Director and Novelizer.

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

"Aristophanes explains comedy"

Herman Mankiewicz

"Samson was the best actor in the bible - he brought the house down!"

"Don't worry - I'm here for the television."

Men looking at black screen, "I call it film noir"

"Welcome to Off-Off-Off Broadway."

"Remind me: Is it the New York Critics Award or the Sundance Audience Prize that always lets us down?"

'Hamlet'

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

Trump! The Musical

Meet Me Outside St. Louis

Daughters on the beach

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

Theatre Masks and Butts

Shakespeare was bisexual

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

'Okay, folks, that's a wrap!'

William Shakespeare sitting at a desk

"The following program was made possible by fluctuations in the random chaos of the Universe...."

Working in the Hazard Zone!