The Relationship Analyst Mugs

'I don't know much about Art, but i can tell you all about his wife.'

Try Mediation

Window Treatment

"O.K. I'm just feeding in your personal details for a suitable match..."

'The bad news is you're going to marry a geek, and not a pro athlete. The good news is the geek owns the team.'

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

"Even though I wasn't always perfect, I feel deep down that I am now."

"And there was I thinking you'd been Beta tested."

"I may be obsessive and I may be compulsive, but no way am I obsessive compulsive."

'It's been years since she sang my praises.'

Awkward First Dates

Talk shows are great. Listen shows are even better.

"My computer just texted me."

"Men can keep a secret, but it takes a woman to tell them that it was supposed to be a secret!"

"Hey. Whatever happened to our sexual relations? "

"So, how are we doing with our trust issues?"

"She married and then divorced, and then she married and divorced, and then she married and lived happily ever after."

Hollywood Breakup

"...and do you agree to accept him as he is, and not try to change him?"

I asked my girlfriend if there was someone else...

"I'll probably die an old woman before I get that bedtime story."

(Diamonds shining, … Dancing, dining, …with some man in a restaurant. Is that all you really want?) (Are you making this up?) (Unsophisticated Lady)

'At last, the newly discovered films of Woody Alien.'

"It's nothing, go back to sleep. I was just getting a DNA sample."

Sharing the Bed with Zeno

Relationships.

'Harlow, why can't you be passionate like Mel Gibson?'

"I'm ready to go whenever you're through fussing with tablescapes."

"I didn't mean your day wasn't hard, too."

"Oh darling! I just got your wonderful value added proposition! Of course I'll marry you!"

"I've had you appraised."

"I miss the way it was when I thought you knew everything."

"She's got money and he's a 'poet'."

"Remember that lovely couple of scarlet macaws we met in Puerto Jiménez? They split up!"

'Edwards... Tamano... this isn't what I had in mind when I sent you two out on the company retreat.'