Texting Wizards Gifts

Opticians Sign With Modern Text Acronyms

'We used to be a nuclear family...now we're cellular.'

'I just got a hex message from Zelda.'

Oymoticons

"So, hw ws yr smmr?"

Adam puts God on hold while texting.

The Mating Call of the Modern Youth

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

'This is Martins, the office I was telling you about. She's got a real knack for texting people down from window ledges!'

Sports Radio in Crisis

Couple kissing by a 'Ped Xing and Oing' sign.

"I'm leaving you, Steven....It's all there in my text message."

'When did they start giving Pulitzers for texting?'

The Art of Bantering!

No, boss, we still don't have an emoticon that says 'I'm laughing all the way to the bank.''

"Miss. Wilcox, get me the coast."

"What do you mean, I hardly moved all night? I was constantly dancing around politics, religion and the weather."

When it comes to texting, she's all thumbs.'

'Hi....I'm on my driving test....'

'Yes, a winky face is correcy...But in ancient times, the semicolon was actually used to separate archaic written devices know as 'complete sentences.''

An ellipsis in the sky

The Town Tweeter

"And she's an interesting conversationalist, too."

"My therapist says you have to at least meet me half way."

'If you can hear me, Larry Gligstein, please send a text to 555-703-7193

'You're entitled to one text message, 160 characters max, so you better make it count.'

"Careful how ya handle 'em Joe! They like to follow one another but they kin also turn nasty mighty quick!"

Less than Ultimate Fighting.

'I've located the lost island of annoying texting clichés.'

"Click heels... needed ASAP... in Kansas."

'Wait, someone just sent me a hex message.'