Texting Comedian T-Shirts

Texting or no texting?

"I could probably text better by slamming my face against this tiny little keyboard."

Moses on the web

"Yes, I'm alone."

The Mating Call of the Modern Youth

Adam puts God on hold while texting.

"Would you like to leave a message? He's on the throne"

"You're not at all like your answering machine."

Man jumping into swimming pool with phone.

'It's a text from Mike - Sorry I'm L8 B THR in a crrrrassssssh!!! ARRRRGGGHHH....;p'

Cold caller.

"Eric, this is your father, mister Trump." "You must have the wrong number. I'm Mortimer Park."

"If you're annoyed by answering machines, press 1. . ."

"All I said is I'd like a little more attention. I don't need the shenanigans."

iPhone Senior

'My client should get a shorter sentence since he did use 'Lol'.'

'I wish they wouldn't insist on using the abridged text.'

'If we are to have effective communication with our partner organisations, it's probably best if we do not use text messaging.'

'Sorry, I missed your call. . . I'm either goofing off at the fax machine or telling someone what I did over that weekend...'

Your honor, would you please instruct the witness to stop texting on his cell phone during my cross-examination? I would, but I'm the person he's texting.

"Hey, Tarzan – no need to yell."

The end of grammar & spelling is near.

"Barry looks to have pulled a mussel."

"Mom, Dad, this is Ryan. From now he'll be managing all of my emoji and GIF responses in your ridiculously long family text message threads."

"Hon, what's an allegory?"

"School can be tricky. They give you text books that have NOTHING to do with texting!"

Lost ancient text.

'What? So you're going to send me all the way back there … again, just to say 'O.M.G.'?'

"Say, 'Tissue? I hardly know you,' but don't tell her you're a roll of toilet paper."

Boy, you were this close to getting in until I checked these photos of you on Facebook.

Phones PDA IM Text. Ernie's always been all thumbs --- He's a natural at text messaging!

'I'm on the train.'

You only do text. I do text AND voicemail.

'I won't be in to work today... I woke up with a bug.'

"LOL!"