Temperature Trickster Pillows

'It's going to be sixty degrees today. Thirty in the morning and thirty at night.'

'Who turned up the thermostat?'

A clerk misunderstanding the use of a thermometer.

Fahrenheit- 32 degrees- meets Celsius- 0 degrees.

High speed cinder block

"Well, team, we've been officially disqualified. You can come out of there, Tyler."

"Yes, dear, I was cool under pressure in the boardroom. It's 58 degrees in there!"

"I warned you about those contortions, Mr. Dershowitz."

"It's improv night."

The inventor of the clock realizes his mistake

STRIP Hambone: This one's a great little number cruncher!

"So Marty, how's business these days?" "Great. I've just sold my homing pigeon for the 34th time."

"It's so hard to settle on a office temperature that everybody likes."

At the baby oil factory.

'Safe!'

'Hon, come quick! I think we have a major computer bug.'

Scarecrow Directions

"Done Dad! I've hacked the dog's social media account and flooded it and his contacts with links to cat videos..."

"Never mind if you're good with people. Can you hack?"

How to write

'I got tattoos of all my passwords.'

'Maybe the Universe isn't expanding -- maybe it's just you.'

"I never ask for a raise any more. I just hack into the boss's computer and give myself one."

Kids hiding plug to giant machine.

'Okay, here's how your contributor's brand new machine works! Now give me my money!'

'Is it just me, or is it REALLY temperate in here?'

"I'll introduce you to important people like Jim, the custodian. He controls the thermostat."

Tred carefully mill.

Cyber crime.

"THIS IS A HOLD UP!"

"Last year, my whole family went on a trip. It started on a Tuesday, and ended just in the nick of time."

"So you want to sue NASA because the Mars Rover is blocking your driveway while taking soil samples?"

"Do you like my new, squirty flower app?"

"Let's just take the Kosciuszko."

'I regret to report that there's no global warming threat after all -- we just got Fahrenheit and Celsius mixed up.'