Telephone Wire Watchers Gifts

'What's the big deal - we've been meeting on line for 100 years!'

'Yes, as a matter of fact, you have caught me at a bad time.'

I.T. Fear

'Dial 1-900-Fortune.'

Busy office.

"There HAS to be a giant ball at the end of all this string."

"#notguilty."

"'If you can't say something nice, don't say it at all' doesn't work with a grand jury."

'We the jury find the defendant very, very, very, guilty.'

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

'And now for the anesthesia: I've got plenty of conventional anesthetics I could use here but you can also choose to spend half an hour on the phone with my mother...'

"Let's take in a trial."

A throng runs out the courthouse to follow a car that is driving away decorated with a sign that reads "Just Acquitted".

"Can you identify the person who assaulted you and then stole your title?"

'So I'll see you in court tomorrow afternoon...and bring your toothbrush.'

"We already changed our phone service to something or other last week, so we don't need whatever it is you have."

"Rest assured we invest your money as if it were our own. Can I borrow 50 bucks?"

'Your honor,does this look like the face of a killer?'

'Hey, bro, take a load off.'

Judge

Office full of computers and wires.

Your honor, why won't you instruct the witness to answer the question? Because he has a gavel and I have a scythe.

'Environmental dept? Yes, just a query. It's August, it's 85?. It has been for 3 months now...'

"He'll come to eat when he can interrupt dinner. He's playing telemarketer."

'If you don't mind, I'm trying to use the telephone here.'

Attention: Due to a lack of interest we have dropped the APATHY channel - Sorry for any inconvenience.

Thanks for the tip. Come again!

'Next on the five O'clock news, a consumer report on how to protect what's in your wallet.'

Hello, 911? … The pizza place isn't answering their phone!!

I'm very disappointed, Mr. Einstein! You, of all people, violating a speed limit!

Alexander Graham Bell receives his first telephone call.

Look, I'm not shocked. It's just that you sounded a bit different on the phone!

"May I remind the jury a guilty verdict for my client will trigger defamation of character lawsuits."

'I think he's lost confidence in his attorney.'

'You Honor, all my client asks is that you give him a 79th chance.'