Telecoms Lawyer Pillows

"Nobody told me the 'cutting edge' would be quite like THIS!"

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."

All of our representatives are busy right now. Stay on the line and someone will be with you in a few miles.

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."

"Miss Duxbury, put me through to someone."

'My ring-tone's inaudible to humans.'

Birds on a wire, "Bernie?...Oh he's gone cable!"

'So you still can't get a sound engineer then?'

Telephone line ends up buried in the ground with a headstone.

'Yeah, you have lips like Mick Jagger ... ok, back to the teleconference.'

HUAWEI 5G

"Der, dad. . . it's wireless!"

'The boss said things have to improve or my job is going to run out of minutes.'

Astronaut sees cell tower on the moon.

"Thank you for holding. . .Your call is important to us. . .Yeah right."

'What does the internet have against my people?'

Do your emails stand out from the rest?

Phone solicitors like customers who are afraid to hang up.

'Right here is where your imaging data is clogging up all of your bandwidth.'

"Well, at least one of us passed the emoji eye exam..."

'With all these mega mergers between electronics and telecommunications firms, I just got an obscene email from the toaster...'

'Wrong number. Sorry, I dialled my salary by mistake.'

'Don't call us, we'll call you, inc,'

Networking

"The Internet puts the world at your finger tips."

Phoning a Busy Sheep: 'Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, please make an animal noise after the bleat!'

'It's engaged.'

'The boss said things have to improve or my job is going to run out of minutes.'

"We've induced the stem cells to grow into a fully functional, organically embedded communication device. We're calling it a 'cell phone'."

"This is a computer speaking. I will now misconnect you and your party."