Telecom Pillows

"I've received 600 robocalls today. For Christmas I'd like robocall, spam and junk mail blockers."

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

I no longer migrate. It's easier to just telecommute.

"I was going to have my people call his people, but I’m pretty sure his people have Caller I.D."

All of our representatives are busy right now. Stay on the line and someone will be with you in a few miles.

"Oh! It's you! I was expecting the machine."

Birds on a wire, "Bernie?...Oh he's gone cable!"

'So you still can't get a sound engineer then?'

HUAWEI 5G

'Yeah, you have lips like Mick Jagger ... ok, back to the teleconference.'

"Thank you for holding. . .Your call is important to us. . .Yeah right."

'Hello, Pastor Parker here. Thank you for calling moral support. Your call may be monitored to ... '

Astronaut sees cell tower on the moon.

'The boss said things have to improve or my job is going to run out of minutes.'

Phone solicitors like customers who are afraid to hang up.

"Well, at least one of us passed the emoji eye exam..."

"The Internet puts the world at your finger tips."

'The boss said things have to improve or my job is going to run out of minutes.'

"This is a computer speaking. I will now misconnect you and your party."

1876 - Alexander Graham Bell made the world's first telephone call.

Cold caller.

'Don't call us, we'll call you, inc,'

"Camera not working."

Networking

Phoning a Busy Sheep: 'Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, please make an animal noise after the bleat!'

'It's engaged.'

'Wrong number. Sorry, I dialled my salary by mistake.'

"Come in, Wilson. I've traded my phone for some booze. Just another unexpected consequence of the breakup of AT&T."

'Your call is very important to us, so please continue to hold.'

"Knowing two languages is sure handy when telemarketers call."

Bird on phone: 'Hold on, I have caw waiting.'

'... Press 7 to admit defeat...'