Teenage Tech Tactician Gifts

Researching Life's Deepest Questions! How do I keep tabs on my daughter's internet use? How do I block my mother online?

I wish you kids would get off your electronics and learn a practical skill. Work with your hands! What does he think we're doing?!! Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap.

"His first word was 'Dotcom'."

'That cloud doesn't look like a horse to me, but if I import it into Photoshop...'

Telephone message - 'This is a recording. If you'd like to speak to a real live human being, forgetaboutit.

"I'll be glad when this is over and Sarah can be herself again."

The whole family can't wrench a teen away from his computer.

'This will be tough. The parents can handle Bs and Cs, but I really gotta spin this D in math.'

"I dreamt I went to school without my phone!"

"I'm sure you may need your phone, portable charger, laptop, iPad, Xbox, and music player. But we're only going to the mailbox."

'Oi, do you mind, trying to speak to my colleague - two self service tills having a chat together.'

"When you said something about a stream, I thought you were talking about video."

"Sorry, Man! I had no idea Alexa would be here!"

"I'll take anything that connects to the internet."

"Mrs. Martin is here. She's the new substitute teacher."

Baby Buggy Workstation.

This Amount of Computer Code

"I can't understand why you're getting no signal down here? There's plenty of Hotspots!"

What's with our son? For once he's not online. I dealt with him. He's steaming mad. What did you do? I handled his addiction to texting, IM-ing, games and Facebook with calm maturity. Dad! Where did you hide my laptop?!! Modern maturity.

'Is that the computer language you've been studying in school, dear?'

Kid sweeps dirt under his junk on the floor.

Wi-Fi password?

"...first, let's just figure out an adjustmetn to my allowance..."

Playing chess with a QR code for a chessboard

Doctor handing cell phone to patient: 'Here, take this and call me in the morning.'

"It's all set. We both have enough credits to go to college."

"Is anybody listening to me?"

'I can't come over to play video games after school. I'm teaching an adult education class on using the internet to download and upload music and photos.'

'I'm very concerned about the surveillance society.'

'Your allowance has been wire transferred to your debit card.'

"I'm having all unwanted emails go to an Uncle Spam folder."

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'You want me to stop playing video games and go outside to play? In all that air pollution?'

Man plays chess against TV.

"Depends on how you define intuitive."