Teen Behavior Pillows

'It's making me happy.'

"Have you noticed a change in Sophie since she turned 14?"

'I know she hasn't turned out well but there's no sense in us BOTH feeling guilty about it.'

"I wasn't sure about veganism until I saw how much it inconvenienced my parents."

"The way he stacks those blocks, I see repression, some hostility, and a lot of dissatisfaction with his place in society."

The Brothers Grime

'I'd explain how the TV, VCR, DVD, surround sound home entertainment system works...but I don't know.'

'Good night, Dear. Text me if you need anything.'

"Young man, go to your room and stay there until your cerebral cortex matures."

'No, that wasn't your mother calling to ask if you were okay. That was your mother calling to ask if I was okay.'

'Isn't it time you started thinking about cars instead of horsie rides?'

'We're the parents. What we say goes. . . In one ear and out the other.'

"Having a cat will prepare us for having a teenager one day."

'Beware of the teenager.'

"A major crime publisher is interested in publishing your homework!"

Spring Break.

'I'm going to bed...whatever...'

'We've created a teenager!'

'I called you in to talk to you about your son not being able to sit still.'

'These are very powerful tranquilizers for when your teen has he horrific tantrums. Take two of them anytime she flares up.'

"My name is Van Gelsing, Madame. I'm an expert in cleaning teenagers' rooms. If you need me, just give me a call, okay?"

"Are you one of these youngsters who has a very short attention span?"

"You don't look much like a werewolf."

"Yes, we're supposed to sing, but not Rap!"

' I see Brad's playing his new video game again.'

"If you liked tonight's meal, you might enjoy 'Making The Meal,' a documentary with outtakes and commentary when the cook ran out of eggs because someone put an empty carton back in the refrigerator..."

"You just wait tilll your father gets home!!"

Ringtones Kids Can't Hear.

"Maybe if your creativity had fewer outlets, it would come out of you with more force."

"Hi - Mom? Going to Kayla's house? Thanks!"

'You've failed to reach your performance targets,we'll have to let you go.'

"Of course, you've always set a good example for me ... that's why you embarrass me so much."

Kids' energy levels

The pop-up book of fighters