Technophobe Turned Techie Pillows

"Grampa didn't like the internet until he found sites that confirm his biases."

Grandma's caf

"Good heavens William, what have you downloaded off the internet this time?"

"GPS? In my day, a newcomer learned to find his cubicle by memory."

High speed cinder block

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

"Hey! Get back here!"

"Tarzan no want computer."

Pensioners and Phones

Members of the Luddite community carving computers from solid blocks of oak and maple

"Nurse, hitting the top and yelling 'work, you piece of crap!' doesn't even help with computers. It helps even less with patients."

"In my experience, there's nothing good at the end of a trail like this."

'Miss Wayson, find out who put this computer on my desk and tell them to get it the hell out of here!'

'Darling, I've just deleted the computer,'

"Why would I upload my files to a computer?"

'...one kilobyte of idiot.'

"Can you give me your Christmas list on a regular sheet of paper? I don't know how to open the word document you emailed me."

'The main thing I like about this place is the complete absence of technology.'

'The Comedy of Computer Errors.'

'Looks good on paper. Let's scan it in and see how it looks on the screen.'

Grandpa Billy never did understand how you can listen to music using ear spuds.

"I think it's time my grandpa upgraded his keyboard."

"When your computer is locked up, lady, you should call your computer's customer service, not a locksmith!"

"No cell phone, no e-mails... boy, I've never felt so free1"

'I don't have e-mail or fax, not even a computer...if you haven't already guessed, I'm still living in the typewriter age.'

"Technology moving too fast."

"You're a great plummer, but those skills won't help you with fixing you computer. So put the plunger away and call a professional."

'We've papered over the new flat screen TV to make it less obtrusive'

"I'm old! I thought it was the television!"

'Forgive me father, for I've been faking computer literacy.'

'He'll never switch to digital because he doesn't believe in pixels.'