Technophobe At Heart Pillows

A "club"?--- but you know I'm a technophobe.

Grandma's caf

"Good heavens William, what have you downloaded off the internet this time?"

High speed cinder block

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

"GPS? In my day, a newcomer learned to find his cubicle by memory."

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

Bill was so determined to Twitter no one dared tell him he couldn't do it with a calculator.

"Hey! Get back here!"

"Tarzan no want computer."

'I can't work with computers, on account of my animal magnetism.'

'You know, it's kind of nice turning off the sound, turning on closed caption, and listening to piano music.'

Members of the Luddite community carving computers from solid blocks of oak and maple

Pensioners and Phones

EEEEEEEEEEEE-Mail

"In my experience, there's nothing good at the end of a trail like this."

'Miss Wayson, find out who put this computer on my desk and tell them to get it the hell out of here!'

'...one kilobyte of idiot.'

"Why would I upload my files to a computer?"

'The main thing I like about this place is the complete absence of technology.'

"It happens every time we get a new piece of equipment...He won't invest the time to study the instructions and it ends in disaster."

"I'm meeting with Thor for drinks. He doesn't zoom.

"Can you give me your Christmas list on a regular sheet of paper? I don't know how to open the word document you emailed me."

'The Comedy of Computer Errors.'

"Some people are reluctant to accept change."

'Looks good on paper. Let's scan it in and see how it looks on the screen.'

'Forgive me father, for I've been faking computer literacy.'

"You're a great plummer, but those skills won't help you with fixing you computer. So put the plunger away and call a professional."

"I'm old! I thought it was the television!"

"Technology moving too fast."

"When your computer is locked up, lady, you should call your computer's customer service, not a locksmith!"

"No cell phone, no e-mails... boy, I've never felt so free1"

"I think it's time my grandpa upgraded his keyboard."

'I don't have e-mail or fax, not even a computer...if you haven't already guessed, I'm still living in the typewriter age.'

Grandpa Billy never did understand how you can listen to music using ear spuds.