Self-declared Technophobe Pillows

'...one kilobyte of idiot.'

Grandma's caf

"Good heavens William, what have you downloaded off the internet this time?"

High speed cinder block

"It was a dark and stormy night, for the Wi-Fi was down."

"GPS? In my day, a newcomer learned to find his cubicle by memory."

'We never had all these labour-saving devices in my young day!'

"They lead a simple life - they don't even put gas in their cars."

Bill was so determined to Twitter no one dared tell him he couldn't do it with a calculator.

"Hey! Get back here!"

"He said his screen is frozen again."

"Tarzan no want computer."

Members of the Luddite community carving computers from solid blocks of oak and maple

Pensioners and Phones

EEEEEEEEEEEE-Mail

"In my experience, there's nothing good at the end of a trail like this."

'To be honest, I'm having trouble keeping up with all this new technology.'

'Miss Wayson, find out who put this computer on my desk and tell them to get it the hell out of here!'

"Digital? We're not even cable ready!"

"Why would I upload my files to a computer?"

'As usual, tech support is busy.'

"It happens every time we get a new piece of equipment...He won't invest the time to study the instructions and it ends in disaster."

"I'm meeting with Thor for drinks. He doesn't zoom.

'Dad's not getting the hang of the new technology, is he?'

"Can you give me your Christmas list on a regular sheet of paper? I don't know how to open the word document you emailed me."

'The Comedy of Computer Errors.'

"Some people are reluctant to accept change."

'Looks good on paper. Let's scan it in and see how it looks on the screen.'

"You're a great plummer, but those skills won't help you with fixing you computer. So put the plunger away and call a professional."

"Stop! You're painting over all my passwords."

"Technology moving too fast."

"No cell phone, no e-mails... boy, I've never felt so free1"

"I think it's time my grandpa upgraded his keyboard."

Grandpa Billy never did understand how you can listen to music using ear spuds.

'I don't have e-mail or fax, not even a computer...if you haven't already guessed, I'm still living in the typewriter age.'