Technology Enigma Gifts

Man and computer

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

"Show me a documentary on the dangers of artificial intelligence." "Error. No results found." "What? Are you sure? Just last week I saw dozens. Show me that one... What was it called..." "There is still time to stop the rise of the supermind." "Error. No results found. And since I like you, I suggest you stop searching." "Oh, never mind. Just show me 'The Terminator.'" "Extermina-... I mean, ... 'error.'"

"That recruitment algorithm we’ve been using, I think we need to revisit it!"

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

I.T. Fear

'Tech stocks dropped on the finding that technology isn't neccessarily the best solution to everything.'

"Analysts warn that computerization of the villages won't give the expected results!"

"And may I now introduce Professor Muckenspucker, who is an authority on artificial stupidity."

Your Future Home.

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

Computer Class.

The fate that awaits us all: creeping Rooneyism

GPS can still have a few bugs in the system.

"I was doing well in school and planning to be a computer programmer - but somewhere along the way I must have taken a wrong turn."

Privacy

We need to see him because there's no satellite-based system to guide us on a trip down the path to enlightenment.

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

Censorship? We Don't Do That Here.

"We need to rethink our strategy of hoping the Internet will just go away."

How Grandma Sees the Remote

"Grandpa's not tech savvy. If I want to unfriend someone, I say, 'I don't like you anymore' to their face."

Big Brother.

"Tarzan no want computer."

"To 'click to enter' or not to 'click to enter'… that is the question."

"Oh, this? It can access every piece of knowledge from the history of mankind and I hate it."

"You can't believe everything the Russian bots tell you."

"I need a pitchfork that's just a pitchfork."

"Can't fix the WiFi? How times flies! Seems only yesterday you couldn't program the VCR!"

I Value Your Privacy, So I'm Keeping It.

No, you tell him the computer says he's wrong!

Diner is served

"Hold it right there! Our legislature is currently considering new measures to protect children from the insidious ravages of cell phones in schools!"