Tech Users Pillows

Oh, I'm not taking a selfie. I'm just really farsighted.

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

'The check is in the email attachment.'

In the Guru District

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

'Our parents were replaced by machines - We'll be replaced with new software.'

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

'Do you remember when our time away from the office was our time...'

"There's smart phones and smart cars, so why can't there be smart rooms that clean themselves?"

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

Woman uses a remote control to turn on the sunset.

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

Claus 2.0

It's a male thing - I saw a toaster with power assist, and I bought it.

"He might not have got the job with Google, but they weren't going to stop Brian skateboarding to the office."

"There's your son's heartbeat, and over here is the app he's developing."

'Why can't we have a texting bee?'

Girl with smart phone enters door that says "Social Media Studies"

'That's about it so far, Son.'

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

Evolution.

"One more time, Mr Claus - who sold you the data?"

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

'Who changed the password to 'arf'?'

'I guess mother and baby are doing fine. She's already sending out selfies.'

"In the old days, we had to constantly feed the screensaver."

"My online account predicts the things I should own, then buys them with my credit card. It�s very convenient, but I do now need to move to a larger house."

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

"Uh-oh...it's starting to delegate work to me."

Gen-Next Library

The Little Search Engine Who Could: 'I think I can...I think I can...'

"I give up. Where's the power button?"

"If Google Translate is correct, they want our women and our cattle."