Tech Troubleshooter Gifts

'Well, this looks like the spot where your bandwidth is getting all clogged up.'

"Elsa, You're Frozen Again."

'Well, I told you not to open that attachment!'

"You may want to look into getting a better cybersecurity system. I don't think that sign will be enough."

'Funny, really. They always click on 'install' without reading the license agreement.'

'According to the hospitals new electronic patients records system he's pregnant.'

'I don't care if this security software was a bargain; it shouldn't reply with 'close enough' when I enter the wrong password.'

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

'Have you tried switching OFF and ON again?'

"Just so you know, I only tolerate your generation because you can troubleshoot my technology issues."

"You fix it by buying a new one."

'I forgot my password, but surely you RECOGNIZE me!'

'I'm going to switch to plan 'B'. Our computers are down.'

"Do you have anything to help get rid of these?"

'The signal is still weak. I'm gonna move just a little closer...'

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

STRIP Hambone: "System been down long?"

Human Error and Computer Error.

"Don't mind the mess. The computers went down this morning."

'This is terrible Hackers can get through my firewall and customers can't get through my CAPCHA's,'

'IT support? I need a hug..'

"Broadband's down, technician's off sick, literacy software's kaput. I've had to give them books."

"Mmmh... Looks like you need to reformat your HD, reinstall all your software and replace your motherboard. I also suggest you upgrade your OS."

If machine fails to operate...

'Stupid autocorrect.'

"Nah, it can't just be that the plug's out. That would be too simple and inexpensive."

'Find out if that was a computer glitch or a market glitch?'

'I still haven't fired the guy in tech support. He's had me on hold all morning.'

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'I'm tracking your interlibrary loans ... ooo, the truck just hit a pothole in Poughkeepsie.'

Oh great. Not only do we have a virus, but now the computer has developed an attitude.

"I think retrieving the info from that harddrive might be a little tricky."

Remembering passwords.

Tossing computer into canyon.