Technology Troubleshooter Gifts

"Sorry folks-it's not what you ordered, but everyone is getting fettucine until we fix the computer."

'The boss wants to know how much longer till Powerpoint is working again.'

Sad looking computer with plasters and a black eye

"It's the age-old question of our existence, Bill: 'Why does bad data happen to good computers?'"

'I made hundreds of copies to give to all the students in my school. By the way, the color printer is out of ink.'

"They say the computer is down."

'Miss Baxter, bring me another computer.'

"In the middle of filing your income tax electronically, there was a power failure?"

"The cellular service is terrible in these things."

"Losing signal is NOT an 'existential crisis'!"

Lancashire hotspot.

"He's like a computer, works for five minutes then he crashes."

Delta Shutdown

"That's the third time today the copier's broken down!"

"And, Dad, for the mere price of a pony I can offer you free unlimited in home tech support."

Nurse at RedFox fertility Clinic is about to touch a computer when it says: Don't Touch Me - I Have a Headache!

"You're breaking up, Gretchen!"

Our bank account is now behind a paywall...

Computer dating scams make it even harder for the Invisible Man to get a date.

"Out of toner."

It's for you. Your nephew's been arrested. What? Why? He was pulled over by a cop for watching tv on his cellphone while driving. Oh dear. Just go bail him out. Do you know what they do to multitaskers in the joint!? Debug my tablet or you're dead. Mommy.

As you know, I dislike you immensely. Right back at you. However

Pounding speeds up the computer.

'Human Error .. Yet Again.'

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

"Sorry, we've found an app that's better at being you than you!"

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

"Now that's what I call customer service!"

'Sorry, suffering from burnout return in a week.'

"Nope, I still only have one bar."

"One of the advantages of working from home is the free tech support."

Bob invents a device that electrically shocks anyone who calls between 11 p.m. and 7 a.m.

"Remember, if I'm ever on life support unplug me... then plug me back in. See if that works."

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

"Does anyone know anything about spyware?"