Tech-tormentor Gifts

'I hate technology!'

'Do you think, perhaps, that we could start shooting for a few longer-term goals around here?'

'The wheel was great, but what have you done for me lately?'

'Put an egg in the bowl and beat it with the whisk.'

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

Reach for the Star.

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

"Women Supporting Women!"

"I've just been offered a job sorting out the Y1K bug.."

Academic Idol - 'Professor Johannsen's paper was zippy. It had robust vocabulary and I almost felt that I could dance to it. I would give it a 7.'

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

'I like the way you handle responsibility, McWit, so I'm going to blame some stuff on you.'

"I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I was the loudest."

Leadership in the Covid-19 Era

'BANG' and a cosmology institute appears.

"Leadership is all about knowing who to delegate responsibility for all your mistakes."

"...and before you embark upon life's journey, could one of you help me with my laptop?"

'Investment charts can be complicated, son, but that usually means, 'bonuses'.'

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

Teamwork!

"I was young and cocky because I wasn't aware of my shortcomings. Now I'm old and cocky because I can't remember what they are."

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

"Here are the new sales figures, which way up would you like them?"

'With the increase in hacking, the I.T. department has proposed sealing all of our data in blister packs.'

Academics At The Beach: The Old Man And The Sea

"I guess I was a good shot, because I took down 50 Nazis...all by myself. That's how I got my silver star. Honestly, I don't consider myself a hero. I consider myself lucky."

"Well, it's unanimous. Instead of going out of business quietly, with dignity and grace, we've decided to end things killer asteroid-style, taking as many of our competitors with us as possible!"

"A one-word email reply... classic power move."

An old man growing berries

"Give a man a fish and you feed him for the day. Teach a man to fish and you can charge a consulting fee."

'I don't know if money grows on trees, son. I know it doesn't grow in fields.'

The best PE teacher in the World.

"But I see you're having difficulty following my argument."

'Is this the new input device?'