Tech Tamer Gifts

'Before we start, would everyone please put your cell phone in the middle of the table?'

Who is behind the computer?

"I find that my strongest passwords are those created when the cat walks across the keyboard."

'Mary finally solved the blinking clock problem by putting black tape over it.'

"The cat's been walking around on my desk again."

Ask about our new p-chip to tune out politics.

"Pay attention. You'll need to know this if you ever work as a technical support animals."

"He used to fetch my paper, but now that I read online he's my IT support."

In case of computer breakdown break glass

"Our driverless smart car texted me saying it went to get an oil change because I was too lazy to do it. Is there a way to disable its rudeness?"

"This one's too smart. Do you have one with only a high school education?"

"Hold on, while I connect you to 'ignore'."

Man in office smiling in delight as various office equipment dances for him

"Recline is the green button, darling."

'The zapper is taking control Daddy.'

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

"Internet's fine to me."

(No caption. Signs on file cabinets drawers read, "Files Saved to Hard Drive," "Files Saved to Disk," "Files Saved to Traveldrive," "Trash.")

"I got a gold star for going the longest without looking at my phone in class."

"Remember...when the going gets tough...DELEGATE!"

Multi-tasking.

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

'I think we'd be more confident about meeting our targets if we could work out what they were!'

Busy office.

Need an elevated state of mind too!

He has his own peculiar problems whether casting from the beach or from a boat.

"Remember you told me to put my client list on my computer."

Gardener's Calendar: Try to put the other things back...

". . . so, all I really need to do is change one word."

New Swiss Army Knife

"Just put that in my, 'I'll get to it when I can, I'm only human' pile."

'Yes sir, I'll get right on it. Would you like it done with or without gusto?'

'Look! It's superwoman...and all her assistants!'

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'