Tech-speak Comedians Gifts

"We've been married 32 years. How can you possibly still be in beta?"

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'

Screen Time vs Book Time

'You must have been wearing your beer googles.'

"And to my nephew, Todd, I leave my 27 Twitter followers."

Fenton G. Gonklemeyer, Computer Scientist - Booted Up 1928 and Crashed 2009.

"I'd like to TikTok your offer and get comments before saying yes or no."

'What do you mean, I just flunked the Turing test?'

"Good heavens William, what have you downloaded off the internet this time?"

"Of course we'll give you a choice. Would you prefer to lose your job to outsourcing or to robotic automation?"

GO AHEAD ... MAKE MY DAY!

"Darn autocorrect!"

Backlash industries: makers of the macro-chip, bigger, slower..and it even makes mistakes

Chef copy robot

"Between you, Alexa, and Siri, I'm just in a house surrounded by women who think they know everything."

"I've grown numb to exclamation points."

"When they said progress made our replacement inevitable I thought they meant by AI."

'Masonry robot, what are you doing?'

'There's no delete key. You have to use the board eraser.'

'Honey, tell me honestly...does this operating system make me look big-endian?'

'So, what do you want to be when you grow up: rebel scum or loyal servant of the supreme android republic?'

"Siri meets Alexa" "What can I help you with?" "I'm sorry, I can't answer that."

"Oh, sorry, I wasn't flirting with you – I was checking my phone."

'Now where's my Tibbles got to?'

I've always been slower than computers...

'No Jenkins! I said we need to start using the Cloud! The C-L-O-U-D!'

Noah posted his first tweet.

"... And in the event of a sudden change in cabin pressure, please tweet with the hashtag #FeelinTheBreeze."

"That guys is stealing my data!"

'It's a snow mobile.'

'I store all my data in the cloud.'

Modern Calamities. Farmer in the Dell. Do something Maw

What if retail stores behaved like websites?

"Lost drone! Reward! Goes by the name of 'Phantom 3'."