Tech-savvy Survivor Gifts

'My spreadsheet says we must lighten by 152 pounds.'

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

Computer Room.

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

Help! I'm ROFL and ICGU!

"Mom! Your cell phone’s ringing ... it’s Dad!"

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

Text Culture

"This is a tune about going off the grid and getting back to nature."

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

My phone is synced with my tablet, my tablet is synced with my laptop ... but none of them are synced with me."

'You can stick your filthy shell. I'm listening to the Arctic Monkeys.'

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

I just hope my doctor is not on twitter too!

'Sorry, but we're not compatible, Jim. You keep a diary, and I blog on the Internet.'

"My mom's restricting my phone. She says I don't have enough Selfie Control."

'This program is geared towards the youth market. You give it up to five commands and it closes down in a huff!'

Pan Extension Chord

'Sorry, I can't help you, the computer's down again.'

nstead of looking at fish bowl, a kid watches the fish on TV as they are being video taped.

Social Networking.

Child hooking into a television

"Would you mind adjusting the vibrate on your phone? There's a seismologist on TV claiming there's been an earthquake in our neighborhood."

"I'm asking you to write your name on the board. Surely you don't need your smart phone to help you spell your name!"

Follow me on Twitter...

Silver Surfer.

Modern Calamities. Farmer in the Dell. Do something Maw

"If he doesn't go nuts first, he'll be the first person to ever write a novel on a cell phone."

"When we're not hibernating, I've gone ahead and listed our cave as an Airbnb."

"I hacked into Santa's computer and added a few gifts. It pays to have computer skills."

"I've gone electric, you should be too!"

'I need it for my electric blanket.'

"My homework is not done because our home modem is tool slow for downloading the answers."

"Never mind your technology, in my day we had to deliver our jokes by hand!"

"Tell me when it's all cyber warfare, and I'll enlist!"