Tech-savvy Soothsayer Gifts

Fortune teller using a computer rather than traditional methods

End of world nigh!!!

'Before you can enter, you need to punch in the verification code so we can be certain that you're a real soul,'

"I don't know… Did you try Googling it?"

"He's my smart-aleck twin."

"I'll be fielding any questions you may have and my assistant, Carol, will be googling the answer."

I downloaded Thoreau's "Civil Disobedience" into it's memory, and now the "command" key isn't working.

"I'm going on a retreat."

Feel alienated by technology? Tell me more. Press 1 for yes, 2 for no.

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

S�ance "I'm through to your husbands voice-mail"

'Details of the summer fete can be found on our website. The address is on the notice board at the back of the church.'

"Oh, the crystal ball rolled off and fell right on my foot! Didn't see it coming!"

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

''The Thinker' is an outdated concept.'

'I got one of those new crystal ball smart watches.'

'He says he's tried sending you tweets but his cell phones keep melting.'

Before becoming the legend that he is today, Nostradamus first enjoyed a pretty good living at the tracks.

I predict a huge fall followed by a lucrative job offer with a major cake baking company.

I'm just dying to try out this new Rorschach app! ?

"The gods must be on-line tonight."

"Do you know of any good empathy apps?"

Protesting man's sign reveals that his credit has run out.

"Take two aspirin and email me in the morning."

Palm Top Readings

"Nurse, could you please click Ok?"

'I can see much grief, suffering and misfortune ahead - and you'll always be dogged by extremely bad luck - but, the good news is you're going to live to a very old age!'

Plugged In

"I do miss the crystal ball."

'Well you know the old saying... if you can't beat 'em you can always google someone who can.'

"And the meek, aided by social media pester power, shall inherit the world."

"@FBarnes12 favorited a prophecy you were mentioned in."

"Any kind of election is getting harder to call these days. . ."

The Blogger.

Confession plugged up to an amp.