Tech-savvy King Gifts

'The Lord spake to Moses? You mean voice mail?'

Cord cutter

"Now that we have these Earthlings in our power, we can take over this planet!"

"And the meaning of life is.... oh rats, the battery died."

"That's right, it's @kingphilbert3rd... Yeah, with a P-H... That's him, yep, now tap "follow"..."

'This app tells me how near my friends are...'

God sends a text message: 'OMME!'

Go on! Pick a card.

"Buy my data $20"

"I wish you people would just read the blog."

This Cave Updated Daily.

"Hang on. . . I think I've got an app for that."

'Did you try 'Google'?'

'Guide us, oh Webmaster.'

"Excuse me, it's my reminder to get a life."

'I've deleted my on-line homework teacher three times but he won't go away.'

"Since we became a paperless workplace, it's harder to keep track of how much work Ziegler is actually doing!"

"OMG! 12 followers already...this thing could go viral."

'Of course you did better when you went to school. That was before the information age.'

Rationalization

'Forget it - the nearest wi-fi hot spot is in Rangoon.'

"I'm just checkin' my email, OK! I AM NOT googling it..."

"Have you tried turning it on and off again?"

'Until this year, I couldn't find the meaning of life...but then I switched search engines.'

'Thank you for calling the guru. If you want the meaning of life, press one. If you want the significance of the Universe, press two. If you want....'

'Nope...1443 bloggers have already panned it.'

All-knowing mountain guru consults the internet.

"I'm sorry, Derek, but, now that Kelsey has learned how to convert JPEGs into PDFs, we can't justify keeping you on."

Modern Jester