Tech-savvy King T-Shirts

'It's the latest fad, sire, it's called twitter.'

'The Lord spake to Moses? You mean voice mail?'

Cord cutter

"Now that we have these Earthlings in our power, we can take over this planet!"

"And the meaning of life is.... oh rats, the battery died."

"I really don't care what yours says. My weather app says rain for 40 days and 40 nights. I think you should probably go with that, Noah."

"That's right, it's @kingphilbert3rd... Yeah, with a P-H... That's him, yep, now tap "follow"..."

'This app tells me how near my friends are...'

"Hang on. . . I think I've got an app for that."

"Buy my data $20"

No, you were supposed to check the doorbell camera before lowering the drawbridge.

Go on! Pick a card.

"I wish you people would just read the blog."

God sends a text message: 'OMME!'

This Cave Updated Daily.

'The meaning of life??? How the hell should I know? Try Google.'

'Did you try 'Google'?'

'Guide us, oh Webmaster.'

"Excuse me, it's my reminder to get a life."

'I've deleted my on-line homework teacher three times but he won't go away.'

"Since we became a paperless workplace, it's harder to keep track of how much work Ziegler is actually doing!"

"OMG! 12 followers already...this thing could go viral."

Rationalization

"Before I share the meaning of life with Dave, let's take some calls from our viewers around the world."

'Forget it - the nearest wi-fi hot spot is in Rangoon.'

"I have 130 disciples following me on Twitter."

'Of course you did better when you went to school. That was before the information age.'

"I'm just checkin' my email, OK! I AM NOT googling it..."

"Have you tried turning it on and off again?"

'Until this year, I couldn't find the meaning of life...but then I switched search engines.'

'Thank you for calling the guru. If you want the meaning of life, press one. If you want the significance of the Universe, press two. If you want....'

'Nope...1443 bloggers have already panned it.'

All-knowing mountain guru consults the internet.

"You must lose your attachments."

"I'm sorry, Derek, but, now that Kelsey has learned how to convert JPEGs into PDFs, we can't justify keeping you on."