Tech-savvy Eater Gifts

'All tests point to the same conclusion: it is indeed a big banana.'

"This feels a little over the top for pad thai."

'The 'Business Man's Lunch?' The chicken salad comes served in a laptop.'

"Something photogenic for each of us."

I can't talk now, somebody's accidently booted the system and the server's going down!

'Stop text-messaging your alphabet soup.'

"Not bad, but it has a sort of plastic aftertaste."

"I'm not eating a TV dinner. Now it's called 'Computer Cuisine.'"

"Our cook is new, so ge's Googling what goes on a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich as we speak."

"I think you put too much healthy food in our smart refrigerator. It's about to spit it all out."

'Does this thing get channel four.'

'The TZ90C with triple boosted propane burners and a titanium mesh grill with carbon fibre casings is the only way to guarantee that genuine back to nature outdoor flavour.'

"Give my compliments to the Biotech industry"

"No, no … the sashimi is fine. But I’m not crazy about your Wi-Fi signal."

'Beat 3,000 eggs and add one quart of 10-30W oil? So much for putting my recipes on the computer.'

"The most obvious side-effect of having a chip implanted in my brain is a constant craving for onion dip."

"Fresh pepper?"

'The chef is just making your cheesecake now, sir.'

Microwave confusion.

'Like it? It's my digital vest, it calculates calories, portions and price per pound!'

Waiter to diner: 'I'm going to return you to the main menu.'

'I can't make dinner right now - I'm installing new software.'

'Here's to romantic candlelight dinners and infared technology.'

"I wanted crisps but this assessed my body mass index and gave me an apple ..."

"I wonder how many Facebook likes I'll get."

'The vast potential of stem cells...and we use them to make a hamburger!'

Storefront reading "Net 'n' Nosh (Formerly Books 'n' Java)"

"Bad news Dad, I've just received an e-Alert: The farmer's wife has downloaded a "Coq au Vin" recipe..."

'Police. We have reason to believe you've been hacking into your neighbor's computers and stealing their recipes.'

"To be honest it's not char-grilled, it's actually hydrogen-fluoride lasered chicken."

"I'm texting my compliments to the chef!"

'This new diet drug comes as a pill, patch, or as a phone app with Siri saying, don't eat so much.'

"All we've come up with so far is that new meatloaf."

Frankly, I've seen better menus on my computer accounts Package.

Swedish Meta Balls.