Tech-savvy Comedians Pillows

"The fact that I have multiple personalities and none of them are computer literate is depressing."

"And to my nephew, Todd, I leave my 27 Twitter followers."

"I've grown numb to exclamation points."

"Between you, Alexa, and Siri, I'm just in a house surrounded by women who think they know everything."

'There's no delete key. You have to use the board eraser.'

'So, what do you want to be when you grow up: rebel scum or loyal servant of the supreme android republic?'

I've always been slower than computers...

'No Jenkins! I said we need to start using the Cloud! The C-L-O-U-D!'

"That guys is stealing my data!"

What if retail stores behaved like websites?

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

'Some hackers have broken into the system. It goes in as molten steel, and it comes out as chicken gumbo soup.'

"We're neither software nor hardware. We're your parents."

"He's our back-up if our computers fail."

'Much like my hairline and waistline, our numbers are trending in the wrong direction.'

'Universal remote, my eye!'

"After seeing the benefits of web analytics, Amy hoped to learn something by attaching cookies to customers who visited her store."

Social network site runs into trouble.

#NoJunk

"Be careful of what you say. The CEO is listening in."

Last Chance To take Selfie For All Eternity.

"We've been married 32 years. How can you possibly still be in beta?"

'This must be the Sea of Tranquility.'

Jim's Smart Kettle

Knights of the iPhone