Tech-savvy Bettor Pillows

"Business is slow. Everyone gets their bookies online now."

Little league world series of poker.

God's Phone

How I met your mother

Horse five to win, unless they change the jockey.

"We're in a dying industry, and you're just sitting there! Well, I'm going to do something about it-I'm starting a Web site."

-Psst! Back me in the 4:30! -Oh! -Surprised I can talk, huh? -No, surprised you think you can win!

'Las Vegas: What happens here, is a lot less than what was happening here two years ago.'

"Oh, just sitting back and letting algorithms do all the stock trading."

'Okay, maybe I was defeated for re-election, but at least I beat the point spread!'

"Virtual Reality glasses. Well, I said my sermon would let them see the real difference between Heaven and Hell this morning"

Before becoming the legend that he is today, Nostradamus first enjoyed a pretty good living at the tracks.

'I'm all in.'

"Come on, Lucky Lady!"

'The blooming thing took a wrong turn off the course.'

'Do you think he'll win the second race?'

"...and this year's Special Achievement Award for the longest undetected game of computer Solitaire goes to..."

"@FBarnes12 favorited a prophecy you were mentioned in."

Plugged In

"Let me see if I can get Him on speakerphone."

A bet over spelling

'I don't know about you, Sam, but so far my clients aren't going for this cross between tradtional and online trading.'

How to find gold.

A fortune-teller working her new big plasma crystal ball.

"You're under arrest. . . fly tipping."

A Fortune-teller clicking on her mouse attached to her crystal ball.

"Of course I'm good at predicting the future. That's why I invested in a desktop."

'I should have stuck to my hunch, to stay at home.'

'Well, he's back from tech support.'

"This automated stock trading app can halt rallies or downturns, depending on your market strategy."

"How many investment apps will this get me?"