Tech-savvy Angels Gifts

Google Heaven and Earth.

"You're not in the database. It must've been a near-death experience."

"Alexa, play Thriller by Michael Jackson."

'Things just haven't been the same around here since people starting saving files in the cloud.'

"We're in a dying industry, and you're just sitting there! Well, I'm going to do something about it-I'm starting a Web site."

The Lives of the SaintsThis Week: Frieda Witherspoon

Crystal Ball Plug

'Ask about our daily sermon by fax plan.'

"Our father who art at www.heaven.com..."

"Why is there an ad for Jay-Z in the New England Journal of Pediatric Medicine?!"

'Telling me He works in mysterious ways!'

"Let's just say that you're not trending on any site on the internet!"

'For more details or to comment, please visit my faithbook page.'

"Two bars—how about you?"

"Free wifi and unlimited refills are nice, but frankly, I expected more."

Vanity for the Surveillance Camera

Jesus Saves

'Just sayin' it was a lot more relaxing around here before they invented ‘the Cloud.''

"User name and password?"

'Click on the icon.'

'Sorry we don't do 'Pay-as-you-ho' contracts'

"And do please remember to visit our online confession service."

"You keep telling me to back up my computer. Well, I can't back it up anymore. It's all the way back to the wall."

'How can tweeting be hard for someone so bird-like?'

"This model is great. It monitors my heart rate, vitals and counts my blessings."

"This can't be heaven. There's no free wifi."

"Sorry, but you've been 'Unfriended'."

'Please enter your sin, followed by the pound sign.'

"Cutting edge stuff, Mrs Bellamy - Cordless Bell Ringing."

Welcome to the cloud

"For your penance, text me 400 Hail Marys."

Texting Trapeze Artist