Tech Overstressed Gifts

'I'm afraid keeping up with digital technology has finally taken its toll.'

Abandoning the computer for a typewriter.

"Show me a documentary on the dangers of artificial intelligence." "Error. No results found." "What? Are you sure? Just last week I saw dozens. Show me that one... What was it called..." "There is still time to stop the rise of the supermind." "Error. No results found. And since I like you, I suggest you stop searching." "Oh, never mind. Just show me 'The Terminator.'" "Extermina-... I mean, ... 'error.'"

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

"I wrote this one after my third startup failed. It’s called ‘I Got Yer App Right Here.’"

"You are still here."

"This next one is a typical blues number about exceeding your data plan limit, cracking your ipad screen, and losing your new ear buds."

"A watched file never loads..."

"But you said that to make it start, I had to 'Boot it up'!"

God creates humans.

STRIP Hambone: "System been down long?"

'Eiter global warming is accelerating, or my Google map with climate information is malfunctioning.'

Who needs an iPod, ah?

"I miss the old days."

'I was given a ton of great career advice when I graduated from college. Unfortunately, I can't remember any of it because my entire brain is filled with passwords and PIN numbers.'

The Tell-Tale Heart 2: Lost Phone On Vibrate

Love Hate Computer Relationship

Stressed Office Junior

"This is a computer rage management class. Road rage management is next door."

In case of computer breakdown break glass

"My computer crashed. . . to the ground when I got frustrated and threw it out the window."

"They call it the Cloud. No wonder I Can't find anything in it."

'I know the computer's slow, but this really isn't a better way to enter data.'

"These kid computer games are so hard to learn that I've decided to skip my second childhood."

Divorce lawyer "Then it's final, you get the computer as you requested and your wifes gets the house, car and everything else"

The smartphone app learning curve

“Something’s wrong with my android.”

"If it makes you feel better...I usually don't understand what I'm doing either."

"You feel like throwing your computer out the window? Sure, as long as it's fully depreciated!"

'He's rebooting the computer '

'If you want to pay your bill, press one. If you want to discuss your bill, press two. If you're frustrated because you can't just talk to a living, breathing, human being, press three.'

"Sorry to bother you but I can't ask my son for computer help while he's in a in time out."

"If I have an inner child, I hope he comes out and helps me with my computer problem."

Regretting buying a computer from a franchise rather than a local store.

'My computers down again!'