Tech Industry Watcher Pillows

"Wow thanks, Uncle Elon! Best inauguration ever!"

'I'm not calling you in India for technical support. I'm calling to offer you a job.'

"Would you relax? They never look up."

"Isn't there an app for this?"

"...in other news: Google has been admitted to the United Stations..."

'Tech stocks rose on news that nerds are now considered 'hip'.'

'Yes, we have a very diversified economy around here.'

This horse isn't dead. It's just sleeping.

"Facebook VP — you'll be in Circle No. 4."

Fries with that Burgers: 'I lost my job to robot in Japan.'

'All the guys like Sophie. She has a touch screen.'

'D'you ever get that uncanny feeling we're not being watched.'

An Amazon drone crashes into Santa's sleigh

'It's called the iBarrow. It's a wheelbarrow to carry all your chargers around.'

'Back in the industrial age, this was, I believe, a steel mill.'

"I'd like to know why we're selling elements to the companies, and then turn around and buy compounds from them."

Office doors for Marketing, Sales, and Drones.

3D HD TV

Skinny P. monitors the compliance of social media standards.

"Even this wouldn't have been enough to keep the youth from their smartphones."

Updating the Wedding Car

Annals of Technology: The first crude drinking straws appeared in ancient Egypt around 1200 B.C.

Emerging from Bankruptcy.

'If human wages get any lower, they'll be replacing us.'

Jeff Bezos Caricature - Donald's Bozo

Watching astronauts from home

'This appliance will replace that other appliance which replaced all those original appliances.'

'Ever feel like the screens get bigger but the entertainment doesn't?'

"I was a truck driver and delivered diesel to gas station. My boss had to declare bankruptcy - he could no longer pay the diesel for our trucks."

Elon Musk Takesover Twitter

'We've agreed on a name, but not a username.'