Tech-challenged Pair Pillows

Couple in front of computer. Screen reads 'Internet shopping with husband'. Husband is huffing, puffing and sighing.

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

"If anyone has googled reasons that these two should not be married..."

"We're staying together for the sake of our facebook page..."

Today's love

"I now pronounce you man and wife - do you wish to save these changes?"

"Hold on—I'm getting information as to why these two should not be wed."

'Norbert, he's playing our ring tone.'

"...and if you both can successfully complete this CAPTCHA, we'll continue with the vows."

"Amazing, eh? Good-looking, dependable, trustworthy, inflatable."

Zoom Wedding

'And by clicking on 'I Agree,' you agree to the terms and conditions...'

"They're a very hi-tech family. Apparently, even their baby was cordless."

'I thought I was being technologically savvy but now I realize Twittering, Googling and Yahoo make me sound like an idiot.'

"Replying with a heart emoji to a cat video I posted on Facebook is not the same as telling me you love me."

"It's amazing! There's even a place to put your beer!"

'I just e-mailed you, 'good night,' but it got bounced back, so, good night.'

Friday night was always sext night.

"Now right-click on the icon."

"Zoom says we have connectivity issues..."

'I'm changing my status to not complicated enough.'

'Word came from on high that managers had to develop their IT skills...'

Then and now: great readers are now great viewers.

Internet wedding - 'Apparently, you get a 40% discount if you marry on-line...'

"Oh, David! He's playing our ring tone!"

"But the two of us sitting here surfing the internet isn't 'going somewhere together'. . ."

Social Media Romance

'This is my new husband Gregory -- I don't quite have all the bugs out of him yet.'

Damn predictive text, did you mean to break up with me or 'brick my tit'?"

"Just so you know ahead of time, I have a whole new set of angry emojis I'm willing to unleash on you."

iPhone Senior

"Let's just say that you're not trending on any site on the internet!"

'They call it a remote because that's the chnaces of me being able to program it.'

Internet baby adoption.

'Do you, Optimus_!@aol.com. take thee, Sexy69@aol.co...'