Taxation Satire Fans Gifts

"What do you mean you're from the EX-ternal Revenue Service?"

'One advantage of having so many dependents is that I don't have to worry about income taxes.'

"Other folks have to pay taxes, too, Mr. Herndon, so would you please spare us the dramatics!"

'Syllogisms won't do you any good here, Mr Aristotle.'

'I'm dressed as a vat inspector.'

"On my taxes, I claimed my inner child as a dependent."

'Ah, I see you made £2,000 more for me this year.'

IRS, 'You filed your tax return two days late -- Why do you hate America?'

'Sometimes I think it would be more merciful just to enslave them.'

'The IRS is wondering when you might get around to filing your Federal Income Tax?'

'Funny you should mention that - I happen to be involved in a joint research project with the Department of Agriculture for the express purpose of getting blood from a turnip.'

"I will grant you three wishes. You should know, however, that after taxes it will be reduced to one and a half wishes."

American's Funniest Tax Decuctions

'You will make big bucks, then you'll give it all away to reduce your taxes.'

The day after the meek inherit the Earth.

'Sorry, you can't claim depreciation on your wife.'

External Revenue Service

'You can't deduct your TV as a medical expense, even if it does induce drowsiness, improve sleep patterns, and act as a mild sedative.'

'Did he have to report it to the IRS every time he touched something?'

'Come now, sir. This can't be all the wages of sin.'

''Tax Loopholes for the Rich and Famous' was filmed before a live audience of IRS auditors.'

'I'd love to stay and chat, people, but I have an enormous tax surplus to deal with.'

'With the tax cut and the federal deficit, the only solution is for you to earn more, Mr. Syms.'

"You're self-assessment form is a joke!"

"Money from the Tooth Fairy, eh? Don't forget to declare capital gains!"

VAT "Don't worry about him he's just here to deal with late payers."

'That charge is for my accountant because this job is going to put me in a higher tax bracket.'

IRS, 'Sorry, but you can't count them as dependents before they hatch.'

'Service is just a pastime, pal - my job is to collect taxes.'

In other news, a Kurdish group today announced plans to send humanitarian aid to British and American taxpayers...'