Tax Time Trickster Gifts

Personalized Tax-Return Mailers.

'I wanted a few words about your tax return - have I called at an inconvenient time?'

"It only made sense for us to finally merge."

"Do I have to declare this as income to the IRS?"

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

'Progress of a bookshelf'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

Is this your idea of a joke, Findlay...?

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

"My accountant is brilliant - he has just had a loophole names after him!"

"We may have to rob from the rich AND the poor."

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

I've found a loophole in your loophole

'In this class you will learn to apply the talents of creative writing to accounting.'

"For this job, we require someone with excellent multi-taxing skills."

'Hang on, I've just found another one. It must've fallen down behind the coffee machine.'

IRS, 'I think we should audit this one, sir -- his signature looks shaky.'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

"You inherited an extra toe from your father and didn't pay the inheritance tax on it."

'Life, liberty & the pursuit of tax shelters.'

'Will you bring in Mr.Harris' file - you'll find it under 'U' for unbelievable.'

"These are all my financial papers - with the exception of the codes to my secret Swiss bank accounts, of course."

'Don't get your hopes up, I'm only laughing excessively...'

"It's part of a deal I worked out with the I.R.S."

'I'd like to think they contribute because it's the right thing to do, but I'm not above a short sermon on tax deductibility.'

Panama Papers Scandal

"For my will I decided to cut out the middle man and bequeath all my money to the IRS."

'By proposing a merger instead of marriage, we can deduct this meal as a business expense.'

'I'm your fantasy from the U.S. Treasury Department.'

"I wish I had done more pro bono work. I need the tax write offs."

Money laundering.

'No, you can't write off the cost of your wake-up call service.'

I filed my tax return electronically, to speed things up. Sure enough, I got audited in record time.

'I made my fortune the old fashioned way - concealing it from the government.'

"The public seems concerned about the size of government."