Tax Season Preparation Pillows

'Be afraid... Be very afraid.'

Man posting letter to the IRS.

'What do you want first - The bad news or the even badder news?'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

Contrary to popular belief, the road to Hell is paved with a comprehensive, lifetime tax return.

"Unfortunately Daddy already owes the government about 500,000 Pokemon cards."

'Forget the DaVinci Code! I'm still trying to crack the tax code!'

'He's refusing to die as a protest against Inheritance Tax.'

Businessman in suit on beach with financial report and eyes cut out viewing impending storm.

"It's the new simplified tax demand from HMRC. . . Three Questions - How much did you earn last year? How much have you got left? And how soon can you send it. . .?"

"How is the budget forecast looking?"

'Honestly Bob, it's not that bad. If you can make as much next year as you did this year you'll be able to pay off your outstanding taxes for last year. That'll just leave the interest, the tax for this year and... my fees.'

'Brilliant, Prof.Brainstorm. Any fool can come up with a new product, you've come up with a new tax break.'

"Of course, I'm perfectly willing to pay my income tax, but I stayed home all day on the fifteenth, and nobody came."

'...and at this point I'm afraid the tax laws become totally theoretical.'

I've found a loophole in your loophole

"Seriously, do you expect us to believe you put on 143 feet a day in business travel?"

'Congratulations! You're the proud father of three healthy, bouncing tax deductions!'

'Would you do me the honour of becoming tax advantaged with me?'

I'm afraid neatness doesn't count, Mrs Wilson

"For this job, we require someone with excellent multi-taxing skills."

"This pesky decimal point seems to give you quite a bit of trouble."

"It only made sense for us to finally merge."

The Forever Stamp

"So, you want your owners to write you off and treat you more like their kid?"

Fortune cookies based on various business magazines.

'We've gone to profit-sharing. But it's with the IRS.'

"Which tax bracket are you looking to avoid?"

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

The IRS emptied my pouch.

'Do you remember the good old days when April 15 was the only 'fiscal cliff' people worried about?'