Tax-savvy Teachers Pillows

'Your tax return is okay. I just couldn't believe you teachers made so little for so much work.'

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

G7 Tax Multinational Companies

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

'Don't worry! Since 28% of my salary goes to the government, I've decided to work 72% of the time!'

"It's a dependent!"

'How's daddy's little deductions doing?'

"You may think the government is a big 'Giveaway' program, but you can't deduct your tax as a charitable contribution."

'Do you, John, accept a married tax allowance with Sandra ?'

"It's no use, Super Rich! Your labyrinthine, yet entirely legal tax structures are too powerful for me!"

"Carpe De Revenue!"

Footing The Bill

'So, they weren't interested in your Robin Hood tax then.'

"Don't you think we should wait to see the effects of the new tax code?"

Congressional Budget Committee: Benefactor...Victim

'Okay... now everyone smile and say: 'that;s not deductible'.'

'Aluminum siding will be used to cut costs in restoration at the U.S. Capitol.'

Osborne's Tax Cuts

I've managed to get your tax bill down to zero, this year ... however, my bill is $10 million.

New Improved I.R.S.

'Wouldn't it be easier if the banks simply merged with the Inland Revenue?'

'We're all wearing them - they were a gift from Warren Buffett.'

'I'm here about the tax credits for business equipment which you listed in your return as 'Betty', 'Mabel', 'Liz'...'

'I sent my mother to jail. I work for the IRS.'

"I realize how helpless and needy they are, but I'm afraid you still can't claim a human as a dependent."

'Right you've got 30 minutes...start squeezing.'

'So much for the will! Now, before you start celebrating, I suggest you think about inheritance taxes, because, according to my calculations, you will be left with. . ."

"Tell the press direct EU-taxation is necessary..."

'Of course, we could drop the enquiry and agree to henceforth leave each other alone.'

Ever sensitive about its image, the IRS tries a more service-oriented approach.

'Stick a few upper-class tax cuts to it and it'll pass like a bran muffin dipped in vaseline.'

'Is it true that you people give tax breaks for minority-owned businesses?'

Fiscal Cliff Dwellers.

'I'm afraid, Mr.Siimkins, that you have been badly advised - Birmingham is NOT a tax haven. . .'

"Remember, report itemized deductions on Schedule A on your federal form 1040."