Tax Humor Appreciator Pillows

'Giving to the poor is deductible, Mr. Hood, but taking from the rich is still problematic.'

We can't tax a pile that was made before the Inland Revenue even existed.

'Keep you hair on, I'm only doing this for dramatic effect. You're still being audited by the Inland Revenue.'

"You really clean up on these mileage deductions, don't you."

Yes, they are all dependants."

'Hey -- No fair peeking!'

'One advantage of having so many dependents is that I don't have to worry about income taxes.'

'Dad, did you say 'someday all this will be theirs'?' 'No, me say, 'The IRS's'.'

"Other folks have to pay taxes, too, Mr. Herndon, so would you please spare us the dramatics!"

"Rapunzel,Rapunzel.Throw down your accounts for the last fiscal year!"

"Well, I'm sorry. The 3 wishes I'm granting can't exceed the annual exclusion of $14,000."

'How about a windfall tax on baked beans?'

"I just asked to see his tax returns. It was supposed to be funny."

'I've figured out a way to lower your income tax...give you less income.'

'Syllogisms won't do you any good here, Mr Aristotle.'

It's kind of a cross between hunting and gathering --- I calling it "taxing."

"On my taxes, I claimed my inner child as a dependent."

'Ah, I see you made £2,000 more for me this year.'

'This is for the V.A.T.- the Vicar's Autumn Treat!'

'Tax inspector: In. Out. Suicide notes.'

'Even if we did skin you last year, you may not deduct your dermatologist bill this year.'

'Sometimes I think it would be more merciful just to enslave them.'

Ever sensitive about its image, the IRS tries a more service-oriented approach.

'He's testing my Hippocratic Oath. He wors for the IRS.'

"Actually we're one of the few businesses that enjoy VAT visits."

'Oh...the IRS called. Something about an audit. I told them we weren't interested.'

Earl was obviously distressed, as he recounted under hypnosis how aliens had abducted him, and had their tax inspectors thoroughly examine his books.

tax

"Do you have any receipts from this this 'alien abduction'?"

"Stop saying, 'Capital,' Gaines."

Tax relief

"Are you V.A.T. registered..?"

Ancient Greece. "The unexamined life is not worth living." Socrates. Socrates clearly lived in a time before IRS audits.

'It only made sense for us to finally merge.'

"Think of the raising of taxes as a motivational tool to go out and make more money."