Tax Filing Gifts

Tax Returns R Us - 'Sign here but don't press too hard. The desk is inflatable.'

'Apparently they've determined that the economic problems of the country come down to the lack of a receipt for our home office copier.'

'Thank you, sir -- be sure to visit our website.'

'I called you in here because your expenses and contributions appear to be quite elaborate!'

E-File Muffy: Head of Household

"In the middle of filing your income tax electronically, there was a power failure?"

"And now the winner for 'most creative tax loophole'..."

When accountants let their hair down.

Crawl

The new, re-designed, shorter tax return form.

"I suppose you have the receipts to qualify your deductions?"

'I phoned the fire station and they just laughed and hung up.'

I filed my tax return electronically, to speed things up. Sure enough, I got audited in record time.

"What? I filed our taxes online and now I'm celebrating."

Inland Revenue providing tissues for clients

'I can explain my excessive and unexplainable deductions. When I made out the return, I was at the lowest point in my biorhythm chart.'

IRS, 'You filed your tax return two days late -- Why do you hate America?'

Disaster strikes in Utica, N.Y., when 10 people become wedged in a mailbox as they attempt to mail their taxes by midnight on the 15th.

'I assume you have paper work to back up all these time travel business expenses.'

The Accountant Husband

"This year, tax reform has radically changed the federal tables and methods for calculating witholding taxes."

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

In/Out/These Things Happen.

'I'll be late for dinner, dear, I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

'Please put that confusing mess of documents, files and folders where it belongs...in your computer.'

'You'll soon get the hang of it - then they'll change it.'

'Marsha, did you file the Peterson account on the cumulus, stratus, cirrus, or nimbus cloud?'

Late/Too Late.

'You're right. Our old safety files have become a safety concern.'

'The job calls for a little filing now and then...'

'It's only fair to warn you that if you get the job there would be a lot of filing involved.'

Deskboxes: 'LATE' and 'NEVER'.

In, out, shake it all about.