Tax Detectives Pillows

Meet the Author - Scrutinize his Tax Returns.

'What I don't understand is how all three of us managed to get the figures wrong!'

"I'm curious about your dependent children, Scamp, Flop, and Spunky."

'I want to claim for black marker pens.'

Excess Baggage: Fans of 'Deregulation' and the 'Free Market' probably have not had to buy a plane ticket recently.

Flat tax - equal burden?

Money laundering - shows money flowing out of US vault.

Bernard Madhoff $50-billion Ponzi financial scheme.

"Tax evasion is like a cancer, it's growing exponentially!"

"...We've traced your lineage all the way back to a 15th-century East European Count."

'Crisis'

'Are you ready for your FISCAL examination?'

Practical loans vs. devil-may-care loans.

'We need to change the introduction to our annual report. What's another word for bankrupt?'

'I have no one to blame but myself, for now.'

'This is our Greek debt, this is our Spanish debt, and this is our Portuguese debt...'

"I suppose you're all wondering why I called this meeting today."

IRS Audit Section

"It only made sense for us to finally merge."

Eurobonds Explained.

"Thankfully, this year, the results can be attributed to something other than our own gross incompetence."

'Due to recent staff cut-backs and consolidations, I'll be handling your death AND your taxes this year!'

"Other folks have to pay taxes, too, Mr. Herndon, so would you please spare us the dramatics!"

'Hang on, I've just found another one. It must've fallen down behind the coffee machine.'

IRS, 'I think we should audit this one, sir -- his signature looks shaky.'

"I asked my friends over to see how much the adults are leaving us to pay off!"

Horror Theater. Now Playing. Return of the Deficit.

Tax Collector

'He's trying to persuade the Inland Revenue that it's a tax haven.'

IRS agent to professor scrutinizing tax return under microscope: 'Still looking for that tax loophole, professor?'

'You think he overheard my last lecture on tax code revision?'

"Well, if it's a fairy story you want, here's a good one that arrived at the office today."

'Whose idea was it to use enron as a benchmark?'

'Great, and I'll also need some mirrors.'

'I LOVE the smell of cooked books.'