Tastebud Tester T-Shirts

"This artificial flavouring doesn't taste like artificial flavouring."

Bad for you but to die for

It turns out they don't go together so well,

Harsh Mellows.

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

"Now, in contrast to the last olive oil you tasted, this one is infused with sixty-five more dollars."

And then in Italy. . . "But I really don't like bubblegum gelato."

"They won't even try their palate cleansers!"

Wine Tasting and Wine Guzzling

"Your meal sounded nice."

"I detect a subtle bouquet of money."

"For the first half hour, I was, like, really there. Enchanted. But I found the wild-quail confit so disappointing that not even the fig reduction on the poached pear could get me back."

Avocado Timeline

Ethnic food springing out of a menu.

"More?"

'Apparently, my wine-tasting computer liked the '86 Haut Brion a bit too much - it didn't leave any for us.'

Real coffee vs usual vending machine stuff

'Could I just get one that's wine flavored?'

'I'd recommend the white wine.'

'Here ya' go, sweetie. Our Key Lime Pie.'

"Damn these super powers!"

Big Burgers.

'...or, if you're watching your cholesterol, we also have thousand-year-old egg substitutes.'

'Why do my parents have to be professional chefs?!'

"I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. Here, try this."

'Your new teeth whitener is keeping me up.'

'Women cook to feed the soul...men cook to feed the ego.'

"It's all good – but some of it is better."

"Jeffrey eats everything, Mom, because no one has told him what he doesn't like."

'This sugar substitute is perfect except for one thing. It's salty.'

Dijon Vu

"I am listening to my body. My body says yuk!"

"Do you know our soup is world renowned?"

Chef swatting flies into a bowl in a sushi bar.

"...and what has my culinary genius conjured up to delight my taste buds tonight?"