Talking Bird Lover Gifts

So you're a mocking bird...

'Stop me if you've heard this one before.'

"Sorry, but I've decided to start doing my own material."

Polly txt speak

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

"You've been so good to us all these years. Is there anything we can do to repay you?"

Papageno from The Magic Flute

Polluted geese

"Now they're referring to us as ecology nuts."

"He could have been the national bird, but that was a long, long time ago."

Knight feeding his kids.

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

Hey. Hey. Polly wants some folly.

Murder in Apartment 6-K

"He also barks, meows and makes noises like a hamster."

'Don't fall for all that...you should see him first thing in the morning.'

Bird Tweet.

"This works, so why do we need to spend all that energy building a nest?"

Woodpecker carving pumpkins

Endangered Species: Belgian Ostrich.

"If we only repeat what humans say whenever they're nearby... they won't realize we're aliens plotting to take over the planet."

"Instead of singing, I'm going to scream offensive things as loud as I can just to get attention..."

'Stop cracking and hulling his seeds. He's accustomed to working for his food.'

Beware of the crafty Kia bird of New Zealand.

"Have you decided on what you'd like to have?"

"Ever eat a bird?"

"One!...Two!...Now spread those tail feathers..."

"I don't actually talk, I just mimic sounds."

'...so if we can save enough maybe, just maybe, next year we'll be migrating courtesy of British Airways.'

Peace Locked in a Cage

No jay walking.

'Excuse me Ma'am, do you mind if I smoke?'

"And another thing: What's that strange clicking thing you do with your beak?"

Penguin