Talent Show Followers T-Shirts

"Oh heck, it’s going to be a long night, someone’s pressed the golden buzzer."

'He went in for the Worst Singer and won first prize in the Gurning competition at the same time!'

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The David Letterman Show Goes to the Dogs, Cats, Birds, Guinea Pigs...

The Drummer

"An appointment? Let's see... She could fit you in before breakfast TV, or after lunch on Radio Two, or between Radio Four afternoon and the Drive Home SHow..."

'... And I'd like to thank my agent and everyone who voted for me... '

Trump commissions song

"I'm a TV producer. I can get you on one of those fake judge programs, and you'll both become famous."

'That should be an easy act to follow.'

"This could be fun! Don't you do magic tricks, Cruz?"

Executives are evaluated in Dancing With The Stars style.

"This next song is for all the music teachers who said I'd never make it."

'Thank you! This next song I wrote to prove that we accountants DO know how to be 'cool'.'

Well, it's not my fault if nobody bothered to tune the microphone.'

'Usual Saturday night crap.'

'For one of these girls, dreams of royalty are over...'

'...and all going well, definitely no more than 15 minutes of fame!'

'You call that carol singing?'

"She's good because she is our bookkeeper."

'Sorry, I already have a Dancer.'

The ocean is no place for a star.

'I'm gifted but I hide it well.'

'Baldo, being on TV requires talent.'

Jerusalem's Got Talent

"Give it up for Stevie and his musical underarms! Next up, in the house...Crazy Katrina and her jump rope of death! It's something you'll see only on...the Security Camera Network!"

AD 763. Hopeful entrants in the first Easter Island Idol competition.

'Your huffing and puffing completely blew us away.'