Tail Wagging Jokers Pillows

"Shed as much as possible. That way your owners will never be able to give you away."

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

'I see! And, just how much will it cost if she is in season?'

Dog lover

'When he comes through that door, let's all jump up and give him a big kiss!'

I've found you can say anything you like to them, as long as you're wagging your tail.

"Who's a good boy? You're a good boy."

"Well, it's disappointing: Young Master seems to use the term 'best friend' for anybody who pays him the slightest attention..."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were my dog Willie."

'No JAMIE,you're NOT keeping any strays! Now GET rid of him and go wash up for dinner!...' / 'Sorry kiddo,i tried...'

"What we're looking for is someone who think outside the box?"

'In memory of our beloved Skippy.'

"I'm not his best friend. But he is in my extended network."

"It's exhausting trying to keep him from throwing away perfectly good sticks."

'Don't make such a fuss woman, he's only a puppy!'

'Max and I have a give and take relationship. He sniffs my butt...and I let him.'

"You've already been for a walk."

Should I bark? Flow chart for dogs

"If you don't make up your mind who's taking me out, I'll do it right here."

'You tell me how he does it.'

"Well, it looks like you found Rexy's sweet spot!"

'No need to shout.'

K9 Authors.

Headshot of perky dog.

'Don't get me wrong, the professional dog-walker is nice, but it is not really the same as if my Master was walking me...'

'He's barking mad!'

"No, I did not sniff you!"

"What do you mean you've got the dog house-trained?"

'My wife doesn't understand us.'

"You're the on who said we couldn't afford to send him to obedience classes!"

"...and this is Sheila. She's my main squeeze."

"My dog is NOT a child substitute. Not according to his headmaster anyway."

"No, I'm not faking it, I'm really happy when they come home."

"I say you're spoiling that dog."

'He hasn't got a tail, so he wags everything.'