Tail-biting Humor Seeker Pillows

"I think I just ate my tail."

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

'Whoooa,MAN,check out this STORM! It's PELTING down!'

"I finally caught you... now what?"

Should I bark? Flow chart for dogs

"It's been one of those days. I don't know if I’ve been chasing my tail or it's been chasing me."

'No need to shout.'

Arabic Thief Salad - lashings of whipped cream...

"Wow. I just had a near life experience!"

"From here on out it's term and conditions."

"Hey. When I want your help, I'll ask for it."

"200,000 other people have also highlighted this passage of the E-book, you common idiot."

"I can't work on this one. It's too ticklish."

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack In the Big House

"Stay back. I don't know what he's got, but I'm afraid it's catching."

'My investment advice is to relax, stop and smell the roses, dig up the roses, bury a million dollars beneath the roses.'

John Dryden

"We should get together sometime and pee on things."

'I'm teaching him to give me a doggie treat when I stay perfectly still...'

"I'll have whatever is hot, fast, and artisanal."

'I would like you to please not tell people I'm a stalker!'

"It's always poor you, isn't it, Albert?"

'Brilliant! I love it! I'll give you ?25,000!'

"my people are like 70 in human years."

Hunting opportunism.

A Butt Ox

Ratted!

Sinnerplex.

"No, I don't want to know my age in dog years."

'WOOSH!' 'Ok, who set off the sprinkler?'

"A book about clocks?"

"My name is Prince, and I'm a barkaholic."

"What seems to be yer problem Art?"

Courtroom sketch artist at Donald Trump hush money trial has a suitcase full of orange pastels.

What started off as a quiet bath for Stanley suddenly turned awkward...