Tactical Trendsetter T-Shirts

Male Green Beret applying face camouflage - female Green Beret applying lipstick.

"M'lady, we’ve reached peak Brooklyn."

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

"Even the waiters here are organic."

CLOTHES-HORSES OF THE ART SCENE

"Mom, please shake my chair. I'm taking a virtual school bus ride before class begins."

Handbag store - "Perfect."

Bad hair day!

La Table

'She's so put together!'

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

Pashminas are sooo noughties!

Men's business romper.

'We manufacture micro computing circuits. We're looking to hire someone who can anticipate the next small thing.'

Special offer on snakeskin ties.

'I want you to paddle against the current.'

'You'll have to take an online company aptitude test, but if you're the designer we're looking for, you've already designed an app for that.'

'I'll be darned! A nipple mood ring!'

"The Chicken: Just another body type that shouldn't be permitted to wear yoga pants."

This cream won't get rid of cellulite...it just makes it easier to slide into your jeans.

Rap music

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

"By the end of next week, these fads such as social media, automobiles and making fire will all be over."

"Absolutely not!"

"And now. . . which shoes?"

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

A Macaroni in 1772

Keeping warm.

Jewellery Shop: Disposable income spoken here.

"She'll have a semi-wizened, double ristretto with a dot of quail's milk - and please recite a poem while you make it."

'At least we look cool. Especially with the wind chill factor.'

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'