T.s. Eliot Fan Pillows

"Oh, this old thing?"

"I should have been a pair of ragged claws scuttling across the floors of silent seas."

"Agamemnon and Clytemnestra have decided to separate amicably."

Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

"I love this time of day."

T.S. Eliot lacks the courage to eat a peach.

Subway Thrillers

Rating the Sunset

'Take Gerald a cup of punch or something, I think he's feeling left out.'

Scot country dancing,

Circus trousers

Bangtan boys BTS caricature

'Just think of me as your life coach.'

"He and Carruthers are both doing biographies of Tolstoy, and it's a race to the finish."

'Yes, the owners are giraffes...Did I forget to mention it?...'

Lord of the Rungs: Window Cleaner

'Brian hated his long legs and dinner parties'

Tolkien Characters That Never Made it out of the Author's Notebooks

"The adventures of Robin Hood are becoming a lot less adventurous."

'You just grew three inches.'

"Nothing much. Reading a book by some dead white female."

"I read War and Peace, liked 1/2 of it."

"I'm sorry, Rhett, but now I don't give a damn."

'I still don't believe any of that bunk your friend was giving us about hypnosis.'

"Can you come outside and help me. It appears Fido and I have tied the knot... "

Uproarious hospitality

'Can you remember before we went electric and we were all clockwork eels?'

Matthew Webb

Sword

'Well, technically, Eugene, we're not under the mistletoe...'

"Wake up – you're Tolkien in your sleep again."

'I know a Tail Implant Specialist who can fix that for you.'

"The End."