System Critics Gifts

Bureaucrats held up by the workers.

'The meek shall inherit the debt. The rich shall inherit the loopholes.'

"It looks like a perfectly balanced system to me."

"With an average vote of 3.5 stars, the legislation is passed."

'What I don't like about computers is that you can't fire them.'

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"The problem with capitalism is the unequal sharing of wealth. The problem with socialism is the equal sharing of wealth..."

Can't you anarchists do anything within the system?

The old good-cop, psycho-cop routine.

'I had every intention of giving you your pay check, Ken, but the payroll computer has decided you don't deserve it.'

Capitalism

'I was going to teach them the meaning of life ... but it wasn't on the test.'

'I think you have figured out that, with today's overcrowded prisons, pleading insanity will put you back on the streets..."

'Oh no! The sharp elbowed middle class!'

"The new system is 100% accurate as long as the client is called Colin and lives in Swindon."

"How does one experience the ultimate selfie? Swallow your cell phone."

"Actually, I'm tired of the man trying to shape our minds so they fit into some pre-arranged societal widget."

"Of course, Perkins likes to think he can make it to the top outside the corporate structure."

Freedom Puppet

"Parts and labor?"

"We can't have Single Payer - what will people do without claim denials and endless hoops to jump through?"

'I'm going to have to go with the leeches on this one....'

'The government is offering us financial incentives to offer out staff financial incentives to offer our customers financial incentives to come up withsome good ideas for financial incentives.'

You're suffering from the current capital scheme in this country. Me? You and other small business people work your tail off. But the hedge fund managers make billions adding nothing to the economy

The boss said he could never replace me with a computer? That's right --- because computers sometimes experience power surges.

"Bloody privatisation, have you got 50p?"

"Everyone who's unhappy with their health system is here."

'I'm just a struggling actor. Your insurance policy doesn't cover a real doctor.'

Yeah, I'm standing here alone yelling a bunch of nonsense, but if I had a cell phone, you'd think it was acceptable!

'Sorry, kid...that's it.'

David Cameron Parenting Classes: 'After registering them for Eton the next most important thing is selecting the right nanny!'

The Thought Really Doesn't Count

'Jimmy, the most important thing to know as a new doctor is never cure your patient the first time. That way they have to come back and pay you again.'

"In my day we had trimphones."

'We have a dysfunctional congress, dysfunctional economy, dysfunctional health care system... that's why I'm quitting government so I can join the insurance lobby and run things!'