Symbol Decipherer Pillows

'I've never seen this symbol before. What could it mean?'

"Have you noticed the "&" symbol looks like a dog dragging his bum across the floor?"

"I believe it translates to... have a nice day."

"What the ∆∂∑† do most of these Ω∞§Ωing buttons do?"

"I believe it was called 'cursive'."

"Are you sure there wasn't a floor model?"

'At this juncture in my presentation, I'd like to dispense with the illusion of coherence.'

'Here you are, Simmons!'

"I've thought about what you said, about how plate tectonics will kill us all!"

'People who can read Venn diagrams...'

"And that was just your sudoku chart."

"No Jenkins, that's NOT a sales graph - it's my salary increase."

"…And what do you think the cracker might represent?"

"I hope this makes it clearer!"

"Let me guess: Step two, add sand."

'Right there is where he departs from the script.'

"I'm not sure she really liked our gift. She used just two exclamation points after 'Thanks'."

"You may enter, doctor, if you can read this prescription."

'...we were able to hide some rather significant losses.'

'It's this one here, that I don't understand.'

Maze of legalities.

Auditioning for Finnegans Wake.

Never choose a vacation spot by its posters.

'These pamphlets will explain the procedure and these leaflets will explain the pamphlets.'

Marooned Optometrist

"Welcome to our intern program. I'm your instructor, Dr. David Robertson."

"I can't read this scribble. . . ! Just get the usual random boxes off the top shelf. . ."

Two tourists inspecting a French sign

'While we appreciate your hard work Eddie, I think we are going to have to go a different direction with this position.'

Pharmacist, prescriptions - "It's a forgery, I can read it."

Dept of statistics: 'vital...nonessential'.

'Connect insert A, B, and C into slots D, E, and F. Tighten using assembly tool G. What in the H are they talking about?'

'Ophthalmologist'

The good news is they'll probably name it after me!

'His paintings always have a message.'