Swimming Enthusiasts Pillows

'I can't figure it out. I swim all day and I can't lose weight.'

"I will never let you drown."

'I don't know... it's kind of a wet dog smell.'

'Okay, ladies! We're not just going to burn those calories, we're going to drown them!'

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

"Oh boy, that was a huge belly-flop..."

Wine taster with mineral water

A man runs on the water from a shark.

'The 79 cent fish ate the $2.50 fish - shall I charge him $3.29 for it now?'

'Miss Wislson please bring me my spear gun.'

'Dad, can you teach me to swim?' 'Well, I'm not much of a swimmer, but I can teach you to tread water. I do that every day at work.'

"The peasants have lost all respect for the moat."

'Do you make fish cakes? It's his birthday!'

Lapdogs

'Yeh it's just that I haven't been able to swim on my front,since my boob job.'

'Now that's a sexy looking bathing suit!'

'The swimmers line up for this, the final heat, and surprise, surprise, It's the dog paddle.'

No petting in the pool!

"I spilled my drink."

A couple of polar bears enjoy their new swimming pool - a refurbished igloo . . .

'Yes, this is the deep end.'

Rip Taylor Tide

Bathing suit.

"It's not as deep as it looks - that's only a baby giraffe."

"Honestly, you could never make me fly coach again after this." - Flying Fish

Motor Channel Crossing.

"Yep, that's water retention."

Bill Shankland

'He's Dyslexic.'

'Here's why it's so cheap. It's dry clean only.'

"Well, some of us were synchronized."

'Today, students, we will discuss lameness in fish.'

I saw you at the beach yesterday in your new bikini!