Swans T-Shirts

Swans holding 50 balloons.

'Your shoe's untied.'

Odette from Swan Lake

'He's normally not affectionate, but he's really taken a liking to you!'

Sometimes it's easy to see if a swamp creature is on vacation.

Snake with 'toxic' sign around it's neck.

Wow. Worst Tunnel of Love ever.

Gloria's life had been uneventful - until her 40th birthday, when her arms changed into swans.

"Sorry, I can't... I'm really swamped."

'Don't you think it's strange that all snakes are Aries, Taurus or Gemini...?'

A swan grabs a hold of a kite string.

'I'm not hibernating there again - I got the heebie-jeebies being around so many snakes!'

You will be surprised by the wild birds that will appear in your garden.

Pirate Paddle Boat.

Hospital: Accident and Emergency and On Purpose and Suffering Nicely.

"...and the cast should come off in four to six weeks."

Another episode of History Revealed!

"Typical, you knew my mother was coming today, so you had to have a big meal to be torpid for a few days!"

Odile

'And you call yourself a hoop snake?'

'I'd like to return this snake. It's suffering from reptile dysfunction.'

"I was cornered, but then I saw it was Tim, the snake catcher, so I knew I was safe: he would just catch me and release me back here later..."

"Me, I work with a professional snake catcher: he drops me into people's backyards at night and waits for the call in the morning to come and catch me again..."

'He used to be happy just gradually appearing out of a basket.'

'Love the motor home. I just never felt safe driving around in a little van.'

'Come back lads, it's 'armless.'

'He didn't buy us as pets, he bought us as pet-food: He has a snake!'

Danger! Snake heaven.

"You're right—there's no such thing as personal space in a hibernaculum."

"Honestly, no one wants to tread on you."

'My agent really needs to book me better gigs...'

'Things were fine until the day that kid yelled 'Hey look at that ugly duck with the black mole over it's beak and the long neck!'...To think I spent all those years parading around, thinking I was a swan. I can't bear the embarrassment of it any longer.'

Snake -charmer's convention

The last minutes of Abu Prishniad, amateur snake charmer.

"And talk about stuck-up! Just because Tchaikovsky and Hans Christian Andersen knew her family. . ."