Sustainable Laugh Seeker Pillows

"To be environmentally responsible I'm recycling my sister's old book reports."

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

Bad fake tan day.

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

"That'll be five bucks."

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

"I used to drink to forget. Now, age-related, short-term memory loss takes care of that for me."

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

"Projectile hairballing."

'Ben just fired my ten guage goose gun. He should be coming back this way any minute now.'

"What did Jesus order?"

"I'm not a doctor, but I don't think the problem is with your bladder, Bob."

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

Drunk Barber

'When Johhny told everyone he was going to be a comedian they all laughed...'

he used to belong to a cartoonist

"Hey! Get back here!"

"I give up. Where's the patient?'

'Because I'm so sick of those movies, now go get me a romantic comedy.'

'Ha, ha! But seriously folks...'

"I've always wanted to do this - 'knock, knock...who's there?'"

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

Football heads...

Bald Man Overcomb

"Baxter, I've decided to take you off crisis management."

"Ok. . . who added the yellow?"

When Stupid People Get an Idea

Comedy Store - Canned Laughter delivery.

'He's not in now. This is his secwatawy.'

'I don't understand. Why do you want to have your arms extended?'